Happy New Year, Everyone!
May the New Year bring you lots of happiness, an abundance of good health, and plenty of wealth – enough to sustain you.
Now, what’s the first thing we all say as we enter a new year? First, we say, “HAPPY;” then, we say, “New Year.” We don’t wish each other less weight, or more money, or a different spouse. The wish we extend is all about being happy. I strongly believe that our true wishes are not about money, nor about excess weight, and, definitely, not even about others. The wish is strictly about Us, and about Our Own Happiness.
You might argue that more money in your pocket, or less weight on the scale, or working on changing some particular behavior in someone else that bothers you can bring you happiness – or, at least, make you happier. However, I’d like to go a little farther than that and ask, “How’s that working for you, so far?”
By asking that question, I’m not inquiring about your happiness levels. I’m just asking about your race to make more money, or your struggle to lose more weight, or, maybe, your search to find your ideal partner.
- How much have these tasks contributed to your happiness, so far?
- How much happiness have you experienced as a result of not only achieving these goals but also pursuing them?
I believe we can all agree that the pursuit of making more money, the struggle of losing more weight, or even the effort of finding an ideal partner doesn’t bring much happiness for most people, but rather a hand full of disappointments. The question now arises as to why most of us still focus on these tasks. The answer is that it is easier to focus upon other things than upon ourselves. It is easier to look outside our self, rather than to look within. It is pretty obvious that, despite all the unlimited resources out there, most people still fail to achieve their goals. Wouldn’t it be easier to cut to the chase and work on becoming happier, rather than endlessly trying a different diet, or struggling to find time to exercise, or changing jobs, or even tolerating a toxic relationship?
Personally, I believe that by becoming a happier person, you will not only lose the excess weight, but you will also become prone to making more money and finding the right partner. Happiness is a state of mind or a feeling inside of us. Money, the excess weight, and our relationships with others are results of how we feel about ourselves on the inside.
We eat poorly when we feel poorly, not the other way around. We might like to believe that how we look and how we feel is just a direct consequence of what we eat. However, our food choices come from emotions within us based upon how we feel about ourselves. The reason we blame the food for how we look and feel is only because it’s easier to work on our diet than to work on things that may be troubling us. However, if we are being unsuccessful with our diets or with our training routines, wouldn’t it make sense to try a different approach? And, by that, I mean to say, stop pointing fingers at things outside of yourself and start looking inside your own hearts. That’s the only way you are going to see any changes. Continuing to do the same things will only result in experiencing the same poor results.
The same goes with our finances or relationships. How we feel inside is at the root of our decisions and spending habits. We enter into relationships and surround ourselves with people that make us feel a certain way. We choose these relationships based on how we want to feel. We choose to eat the food we eat in our constant pursuit of feeling good about ourselves – or, even the opposite. This vicious cycle is one that we must break.
As we enter the New Year, I personally believe that we should strive not only to become physically fit but also to become mentally fit. We should not only work on increasing our income but also increasing our self-worth. We shouldn’t work only on our relationships with others, but also on our relationship with our self.
How can we do that, you might ask?
There are four stages of your self-improvement journey:
1) Unconscious Incompetence:
Most people live their lives in this stage. It means that you are unaware – not conscious of the real reasons why you make the choices you do. In this stage, you blame the food for the way you look, your partner for your unhappiness, and your needs for your excess spending habits. Since you don’t know what you don’t know, you need someone else to help you see the patterns and get out of this stage. That’s when it’s time for you to call me. I am here to help. In one hour, I can help you expose the personal obstacles that are holding you back. It’s all about facing the truth. The good thing about this process is that you’ll need me only for the first two stages of your self-improvement journey. Being Unconsciously Incompetent is exhausting and makes you feel like a hamster on a wheel. It’s what I refer to as “The Blame Stage.”
2) Conscious Incompetence:
In this stage, you slowly become aware of what you feel, think, and what you tell yourself, along with the actions you take that are an impediment to achieving your goals. As you enter this stage, I recommend not trying to change or do anything other than to objectively observe your thought process, and consequently, the actions that follow. For example, observe how you choose pizza over steamed vegetables, and how that choice makes you feel. It is a tricky phase because, as you move forward and become aware of your behavior, you may find that you want to hide from what’s making you feel bad about yourself. That’s why you need someone to independently guide you throughout this process. I call this stage “The Observant Stage.”
3) Conscious Competence:
At this point, you’ve become conscious of what you need to do to feel good about yourself. Now, you’re on your own. During this stage, you become aware of how your thoughts affect your actions. You’ll be able to quickly catch yourself when you’re about to enter an old negative behavior pattern, and immediately change it into a positive one. Self-awareness will begin to take you to the next level, where you’ll become very familiar with your actions. Gradually, you are becoming the master of your own thoughts and behavior patterns. If you choose to work with me, once you confidently reach this stage, we might only have to check in once in a while to assess your progress and address new issues that might come up. I call this stage “The Awareness Stage.”
4) Unconscious Competence:
Eventually, by this time, making the right choices becomes second nature to you. You’ve reached a stage where you are even able to see obstacles in the path of others whom you know and find yourself in a position, to teach them about the benefits of being mentally fit. In this stage, you are absolutely aligned with your goals. Slowly, you’ve become unaware of the obstacles you’ve faced, and are now able to live your dream life, enjoy your ideal body and establish long-lasting relationships. You now love the food that supports your fitness goals, enjoy the habits that allow you to control your finances in a productive way, and are able to effectively communicate your emotional needs to others. Motivation and Drive are part of your daily life. I call this “The Ultimate Stage.”
Working in the fitness industry for over two decades has given me the privilege of training thousands of people and, from them, learning a lot about the human condition. With all the unlimited resources out there, the majority of people still fail to achieve their personal goals. That dilemma leads me to believe that the problem isn’t about the food, or about the lack of money, or about others. When it comes to happiness and well-being, I strongly believe that we are simply focusing our attention in the wrong direction.
With these goals in mind, I would like to extend an invitation to you as my New Year’s Gift:
Via Skype, WhatsApp, Facebook Video Chat, FaceTime, or in a Face-to-Face session, I invite you to take advantage of my special New Year’s promotion and schedule a FREE 30-minute, one-on-one coaching session, specifically designed to – personally and individually – help you expose the obstacles that are holding you back. Within these FREE 30 minutes, I will help you establish a structure for your goals. You’ll come out of it equipped with tools, motivation and a strategy that will allow you to see results almost immediately.
Email me at Leo@ResultsStudio.com to schedule your free coaching session.
HAPPY, HEALTHY NEW YEAR!
Thank You and God Bless,
“You only live once, and the way I live once is enough.” Frank Sinatra
Leo Frincu is a world wrestling champion, author, speaker and performance coach for business leaders and athletes worldwide. To learn more about his training philosophy, check out his latest book, “WELCOME HOME, 3 Simple Steps On How To Reach Your Highest Potential,” available on Amazon and iBooks.